Pain

Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all
Pain, without love
Pain, I can't get enough
Pain, I like rough
'Cause I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all

While driving home from the Mavericks game on Wednesday, I was rocking out to some music and singing as usual when this song came on. This song by Three Days Grace got me thinking about how in life we sometimes feel so numb and just cannot wait to feel something, anything even yes, pain. When we are in pain, is when we are growing the most. It is when we can overcome our trials and troubles and prove to ourselves and those around us that we have the strength to get through it. Times of heartache for me have been nothing but empowering. I learned so much about myself, my friends, and became closer to people during this time of pain. Sometimes, as the song states "I'd rather feel pain than nothing at all". I would rather be down in the depths fighting my way back to sanity, than laying in a sea of emtyness and meaninglessness. When we are stagnant, we learn nothing, we slump and leisurly go about our business and learn nothing and therefore are nothing. We are simply wasting time. So, if you are ever simply stagnating through life, stop and think about what you are doing. Why are you in this state? How caan you get out? You could be growing stronger, and becomining a better you.

First call

Your wishes are coming true, you get the job of your dreams, you ace a test, you nail a presentation, or you get a car. What is the first thing you do? That one person comes to mind and you simply must let them know that your life has been changed in that moment. Why are they so important? Is it you significant other? A best friend? Your parent? We all have them. The people who get the "first call". The person that you just have to tell something to, whether it be heart breaking or delightful, they simply must know about it. In our lives we tend to fall back on people, no matter how strong we try to be, God made us this way for a reason. He did so in order to give us companionship, a way to feel loved. He is the ultimate "first call". The crazy thing is, He already knows, but never will He fail to show His love to us, and rejoice or be there for us in a time of need. Who is your first call? What is the relationship you have with that person and are you their "first call"? Why that person? Let the people you love know you love them, and your "first call", make sure they know why. If you can't tell them, then how will they ever truly know?

Talk is cheap

I am a student at Baylor University, and a minor in religion. I am taking a world religions class as a part of my religion minor, and thus expected to learn about well, religions of the world. In fact though, I am receiving guilt trips about shopping at walmart, not giving large amounts of myself and my possessions to aide in the civil wars in Africa. I have sympathy for those people and want to help, but rather than trying to guilt me into going over there or something, give me something to do about it. Also, if I was wanting to learn about the trials facing Africa, I would take a class on it. I choose a class about world religions because I want to learn about the primary religions of the world, yet it is the end of the second week of class, and I have not learned a thing about them. I am not very happy about it to say the least.

Life is great however, and I am continuing to love being here in Waco and living with one of my best friends. The only thing I wish I had here is my baby. I miss him a lot at the moment, thus why I am strongly considering braving the snowy weather to get up to Dallas and be with him. Classes are quite busy and they keep me working throughout the day and sometimes late into the night. I am happy to say that I have become accustomed to going to bed at the latest around midnight, which has been very enjoyable. I wake around seven or eight thirty daily and on Monday Wednesday and Friday i eat breakfast while watching my new favorite show, Rachel Ray. Afterwards I continue to get ready to face the day. Shower, get dressed, prepare my notes and whatnot for my classes, and then leave for class and start my work for the day. Tuesday and Thursday, I wake up and get ready, although not in as desirable a pace. I then go to my early class and come back during my break before my two back to back classes at 12:30. I am very proud of myself so far this semester and hope to be able to continue this routine. I have studied my notes, done my reading, and worked hard to turn in my work on time so far, and can only hope and work hard to continue this.

I am also still working at my church, which I love doing and now am getting paid for which is exciting. I am hoping to be working with them throughout the summer and maybe even being the intern again, who knows.

My life continues to be very blessed and soon I will be another year older. I cannot thank people enough for all they have taught me and given me in the past year.